A Bloody Pulp
by The Sleep-Deprived Writer
Summary: There are a curious series of deaths around Forks, Washington that resemble Ooze attacks and Parker gets sent in to investigate. He ends up in over his head as he's neck deep in vampires and wondering what is going on. Note: I am an Anti so, if you hate people poking fun at the series or alternate character interpretations, don't bother reading this.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Before we begin, I would like to inform the reader that I am an Anti when it comes to the Twilight series and the few characters I like are Charlie and Leah. If you love Edward or Bella or the idea of imprinting or various other characters and concepts too much, just hit the back arrow or close out of this now, as I'm going to be taking the implications of various things and running with it.

Parker recalled the reason for this assignment had something to do with how he didn't have a mission that day, along with his status as an SOA agent instead of SOU agent, and due to O'Brian's insistence that only people who'd dealt with the Queen Zenobia or Queen Semirimas personally would be the pool of people selected for the mission (narrowing it down). Whatever the reason, it didn't matter now, as he and the chief of police in the area, a man named Charlie Swan, drove in Charlie's car down to Forks, Washington. "Thank you, Charles."

"Call me Charlie. Well, we've been having quite a lot of problems lately, something about campers seeing monsters in the area. Started talking to the BSAA." Parker glanced to Charlie, who was frowning now. "So, they only send you?"

"For the preliminary investigation, yes. Normally, I'd have a partner from the BSAA, but they thought that two people showing up to the area under an investigation would be more conspicuous. Bioterrrorists tend to be... paranoid about this sort of thing. Thank you for letting me stay with you."

"Not a problem. Just don't want anyone hurt is all. Those things really that bad?"

"...I've worked in the field for years. Yes, those things are extremely bad."

Parker looked to the road. It wasn't so bad, a bit cloudy out and it sprinkling. It wasn't ominous, a lot different than what happened when Jill and he had boarded the Queen Zenobia years ago. They were on a road, winding through a forest.

Charlie cleared his throat. "So, you'll be staying in my daughter's room."

Parker blinked. "Okay? So, uh, where is she?"

"She moved into her husband's house when they'd gotten married. Nice boy, by the way. Edward Cullen, son of one of the best doctors in the area."

"Oh," Parker smiled slightly. It was nice to hear about normal stuff instead of monsters that lurked about in the dark. "So, how old is she?"

"She'll be 22 in September," Charlie said, a bit quieter this time. Parker didn't say anything about it, but that slight change in tone bothered him.

"So," Parker looked around. They were driving into the town's limits, stopping at a stoplight, Charlie turning on his blinker to go left. A few cars had passed by, heading into town as they headed farther out. Charlie turned the steering wheel. "Is she in college?"

"No. She settled down and had a kid two years ago." Charlie was frowning again, but Parker didn't say anything about it. Maybe they weren't on speaking terms and Charlie was being polite about his questions?

Charlie pulled into a driveway and parked the car. Both he and Parker got out of the car. Parker opened up the trunk and pulled out his bag. He just had a few clothes, a toothbrush, a comb, a razor and some toothpaste. It would have been rude to pack any more than was needed.

Charlie, meanwhile, had opened the door to the back seat of the cruiser and pulled out another bag, a smaller one containing a pistol and some ammunition. "Now, I know you're gonna be in the forest a lot, but you need to be careful, okay? There's black bears in there and Lord help you if you get between a mom and her cubs, especially at this time of year."

"I understand."

The door to the house opened up, a young woman standing there. She was wearing a white shirt and some jeans, her hair black and skin olive. She grinned and said, "Hey, Charlie. Who's the new guy?"

Charlie walked to the door, Parker following. He gestured back and forth between Parker and the girl. He said, "Leah, this is Parker. Parker, this is Leah. He's helping with the investigation."

"Nice to meet you," Parker said, holding out his free hand.

"Nice to meet you, too," Leah said. She shook it and looked back to Charlie. "Mom's cooking dinner right now. I'm going to head out afterward, Charlie. Need to head back to La Push and work on some stuff there." They walked inside, Leah following them and shutting the door behind her.

"Sounds fine. Just make sure you're back at Sue's place by eleven, okay?" Leah nodded in response. Charlie handed Parker the other bag and said, "Just head up the stairs to the second bedroom." Parker nodded and headed up the stairs. He walked down the hall, thinking that maybe Charlie was a widower who remarried.

He opened the door and walked in, looking around. It was a nice, cozy room. There was an older computer on the desk, a phone line running across the floor. He supposed that he didn't need it now and didn't want to tie up the phone line. He set his bags in the corner and sat on the bed. It was covered in quilts of some sort, probably due to the generally cooler weather of the region, but it added a nice touch to it, with soft colors to it.

Parker slipped off his shoes and looked out the window. It was still raining out, a bit heavier than the drive up here. He looked around at the room, noticing the pictures on the dresser. All of them had a girl with dark hair and pale skin (who he presumed was Bella): One of her fishing with Charlie what looked like several years ago, a photo of a high school graduation ceremony with her getting her diploma, a wedding photo of her and an extremely pale man who had reddish-brown hair...

Parker smiled slightly. There was something sweet about how her father had kept these photos here, like he was always welcome with having her visit. He got up and walked to the door, opening it up. He headed back down the stairs and glanced around the hall.

There was a small dining room, adjacent to the kitchen, the walls and blinds bright yellow. Leah and her mother were busy, Leah pulling plates out of a nearby cabinet and setting them out on the table and her mother chopping up a few vegetables. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

"Don't worry about it," Leah's mother said. She made a gesture toward an adjacent room."You should go into the living room, Charlie's in there. Tomorrow's going to be busy, from what Charlie keeps saying about the investigation, so you should probably get some rest while you still can."

Parker nodded and walked to the living room. Charlie was sitting in a recliner, watching the news.

"_-deaths appeared to have been caused by a wild animal-_"

Charlie looked up and said, "A couple of years ago, in Seattle, something similar happened. Same sort of injuries found on the victims, then all those deaths and missing persons cases stopped coming in out of the blue. We still don't know what happened to those victims."

"You think it's a serial killing?" Parker said. He crossed his arms and frowned, looking at the footage. Most of it as what he'd seen during the meeting. People ripped limb from limb. Blood smeared and splattered about, but blood missing from the bodies. Some of the corpses were half-eaten by wild animals by the time the investigators had come across them, making it harder to figure out who or what it was.

"Same MO and murder isn't that common here."

"It can't be done by any human, though."

"Yeah," Charlie said. He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed. "It didn't make sense, so Bob called you guys up."

"You would have gotten someone from the North American branch if it weren't for one of the original members. He insisted I or one of my coworkers be assigned to the case." Parker shook his head. "Some of the bodies remind me of an Ooze attack, because of how messy they are, but they normally leave a trail of slime..."

"Ooze?" Charlie chuckled.

"They're humans turned into monsters by a virus. They lose all sense of self, for the most part. There are exceptions, like Rachael, this woman who kept shrieking her coworker's name as she tried to kill my partner for that mission, but they're rare. They can fit into crevices because they ooze around and they drink blood of their victims."

"That sounds like some people I know, only a bit more attractive," Leah said. Parker turned around to look at her. How she'd snuck up behind him didn't bother her, per say, but working in the BSAA made one a little wary of when something or someone popped up right behind you. "Dinner's ready, you two."

A/N: So, I saw a picture on another website and one of my friends made a joke about it, resulting in me writing this. XP

I also had to look up the timeline on the Twilight Lexicon, because there isn't very specific information on the timeline in the books itself (specific dates of events aren't usually mentioned). This fanfic starts off in May of 2010.

-The Sleep-Deprived Writer


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I am writing multiple chapters at a time with this fanfic, so that I can figure out some plot issues (namely that there are holes with Meyer's continuity; for example, contact lenses dissolve in a few hours when in contact with vampire venom, but Bella can touch Edward for hours without getting the slightest chemical burn or skin irritation, despite how vampire venom is both found as a replacement for tears and required for movement, being found between all the cells).

"You sure you're going to be okay out there alone?"

"I'll be fine, Charlie. You need to do your rounds and, in case anything manages to get into the town, having someone here is a good idea, in case anything decides to make a meal of someone here." Parker cocked his pistol. "I've been split up from coworkers before when on missions. Don't worry about me."

Charlie frowned and opened up the door to his cruiser. "If you're not back by ten at night and you don't radio me, I'm assuming you either got lost or one of the things got to you."

"I understand. I'll see you tonight."

"Good bye." Charlie slid into his car and shut the door. Parker turned around and walked around the house as he heard the car start up and Charlie drive off. He kept walking, heading into the forest. The sky was still gray and cloudy, it looking a bit like it were going to rain. The wind whipped up for a moment, the branches of the surrounding trees swaying slightly in it. His feet crunched a few pine needles that had fallen.

He glanced around, following the slightly worn-away path in the underbrush. The most recent victim was found along the trail a few miles from here, so he had a little while before he'd be able to look around. A curious aspect was how all of the dead were found along this and another trail, one that was near the main highway.

Parker kept walking, keeping an eye out for anything unusual. A robin flitted by, it tweeting all the while. He watched it go, then continued up the path. On a nearby tree, there was a bit of something dripping down. He stopped to look at it carefully, it brown. It was probably sap of some kind. He continued on his way, listening and watching for anything that hinted at a BOW.

There were just two things that really bothered him about this whole mess. There was how there was a sort of hidden quality to all of the attacks. And the other thing was that, if it were Ooze creatures, why on earth were they up here instead of over by the ocean? Sure, it was rainy from what he'd heard, but he still found it strange that a terrorist would avoid using their BOWs in their most effective environment. Hell, now that he thought of it, it was even more bizarre that this wasn't happening in Seattle or somewhere with more of a population.

He shook his head. There were a few bird calls through the woods, a rustle or two aside from the crunch and rustle of his shoes along the faint path. A light sprinkle starting to fall from the gaps between the trees and to drip down the needles and branches. He turned his head to where it'd come from, aiming at it. A small deer leaped out and bounded across the path, bounding away and heading deeper into the forest.

Parker lowered his gun for a moment, then brought it back up. A deer wouldn't run so close to a human, unless there was something dangerous that it was more frightened of. He scowled and stared walking slowly toward where it'd come from. It was a bit off the path and he'd probably have to mark the trees, so he didn't end up lost in here.

"Dammit..." Parker resorted to pulling out the knife from his leg holster. In one hand was the gun, in the other the knife. He started walking slowly, careful to not step on any branches or pinecones, trying to keep as quiet as possible. On a tree he passed by, he stopped to slowly cut a slash into the bark at shoulder level. As he kept going, he still marked the trees, heading west (from what he could tell).

He blinked when he ended up in a field after a few more paces. It was a small pasture, free of trees, but it was filled with flowers of all sorts. He glanced around for any sign of any creatures. He noticed a bit of movement across the field, in the trees. He walked quickly and quietly, toward the movement.

As Parker had just gotten to a few meters from whatever was in the trees, he heard a very large snarl and felt a stabbing pain across his left side mixed with the force of something hitting him with quite a lot of power. He dropped his weapons as he flew back about a meter, hitting the ground with a loud whump and several ominous cracking noises. He clutched at his side, his back feeling as though someone was repeatedly stabbing all throughout it. His fingers felt strangely warm and wet.

Parker opened his eyes to see a large black bear looming over him, its' lips curled back into a snarl and its' teeth glinting. He saw movement to his side and glanced over. There were a pair of cubs, fuzzy and black. "Merda..." he said weakly.

He hissed in pain, closing his eyes. It was hard for him to breathe, a shooting pain along the left side of his chest as he did so. There was a strange sound, likes some sort of thumping, getting louder and louder. The sound of a yelp and a loud thump made him wonder what was going on, but he was too tired to do anything.

The feeling was strange, something (_someone? _he thought vaguely) extremely cold lifting him up. On top of all the pain, he wondered if this was what death was like. He'd been near death before, sure, but this seemed a bit different than last time. After that, he passed out, too weak from blood loss and pain.

Parker yelled. He couldn't help it. It felt as though someone had doused him in lighter fluid and set him on fire from both the inside and out. He clutched at the sheets (_sheets?_), barely hearing the rip over the haze of pain he was in and his own yells.

Waking up again to extreme pain was not what he'd expected.

Hell, waking up at all was a surprise.

Maybe he was dead and in Hell after all? Years of drinking and (depending on scripture interpretation) the whole "into men" thing probably put him over the edge.

It was as though every single cell in his whole body was being ripped apart and lit on fire. It was unbearable and he still yelled, his voice growing hoarse fast. Minutes seemed to drag on and on, seconds seeming like they'd barely budge along, almost grudging in passing by. He lost all sense of time at this point, but, despite that, the pain never dulled. His voice cracked, then quieted to a whisper, then nothing, him still shouting but no sound coming out.

Later (he couldn't tell one length from the next at this point, so there was only then and now), his mouth and throat seemed so dry. If only he could have a drink of water, even a sip. But he couldn't say a word. Hell, was there anyone around to hear him in his shrieking?

Eventually, though, it started to die away. He didn't have much hope it'd end, though. It was so long since he didn't feel that torturous pain that had been wracking his body, destroying him. Slowly, very slowly, he was able to think. Maybe this was ending? What was _this,_ anyway? It died away, the pain, but it picked up speed and started to dissipate more and more quickly.

Parker shook his head once the pain was mostly gone and sat up. His throat still burned, dry as a desert. He blinked as he looked around. He was on a bed of some kind, it covered in white sheets with dry bloodstains about it and rips alongside. He blinked again. It was bizarre, like he could see the individual threads that went into making the cloth, along with the ripped parts of fabric having the frayed ends of the strings.

"Hello."

Parker jerked his head to look at who it was. There was an extremely pale, blond man sitting on a chair. He looked like a doctor of some sort, if his clothes were anything to go by, but he seemed much too young to be one. Maybe he was a medical student? Parker gave him a confused look. "Hello?" he said, his voice cracking from the dryness. He didn't want to talk, he just wanted a damn glass of water.

"My name is Carlisle."

"I'm Parker. Do you have w-water?" His voice cracked again. It hurt to speak and it hurt not to have something to deal with the pain.

"I am afraid not," Carlisle said. He stood up quickly and said, "Parker, I have saved your life. Come on..." He made a gesture for Parker to get up.

Parker gave him a pained look and did so, feeling a bit weary and still focused on the burning in his throat. It was nearly intolerable and the only thing he could focus on for an extended period of time. It as as though it wouldn't die away and he wouldn't get used to it, no matter how long it went on. He glanced around the room, vaguely taking in that there were books on the shelves and that there were a few very old paintings hung up.

All the while, Parker was completely baffled as to how he wasn't dead and how he was up and about. How long was he unconscious? What about investigation? What about Charlie and the BSAA?

Carlisle opened the door and walked out, Parker following after him. They headed down the stairs, into a very bright living room. There was a squeal of delight and Parker felt someone jump on his back.

Parker grabbed their arm and flipped them onto the ground in front of them, his teeth bared. He shook himself and looked confusedly at the young woman, a diminutive girl with dark brown hair who seemed cheery to beat the band. She bounced back up and chuckled. "Knew you were going to do that, but I kind of wanted to see what would happen, since I also saw you not doing it and ignoring me."

Parker rolled his eyes and frowned Were these people going to spend all their time trying to keep him from ever getting a damn glass of water?

"You seem grumpy," she said. "What, angry that bear ruined your clothes? I got just the thing for your first hunting trip. Be right back!" She skipped away, heading up the stairs.

Parker glared at Carlisle.

"My daughter, Alice. She's... quite fond of fashion trends."

"I'm confused, my throat hurts, and I want a damn glass of water, not playing dress-up with a med student's kid that's way too old to be his kid. Is it too much to ask for some water?"

"You need blood, not water."

Parker stared at Carlisle. "What?" His mind was in a haze. He must have not heard that right.

"You're a vampire, Parker. My family and I are vampires and I transformed you to save your life."

"So I'm a monster. Great, as if my day couldn't get any worse." Parker tried swallowing his saliva, but it did nothing to ease the pain in his throat. He threw his hands into the air and walked away, heading toward the front door.

Carlisle put a hand on his shoulder. "My family and I only drink animal blood, not human blood. You need to go hunting. There are plenty of deer around the area and I'll make sure you don't go killing a human... Of course, you'll have to avoid human society for a year, unless your gift allows you to avoid killing in your bloodlust..."

Parker shrugged off Carlisle's hand. He turned to look at the man. "Look, I'm finding it hard to believe I'm a vampire... I'm just damn thirsty, possibly have a throat infection, and think you're delusional. Seen a lot of things in my time and a vampire isn't one of them."

"And here's Alice..." Carlisle said, as Alice was carrying under one arm a mirror much too heavy for someone of her stature to lift. She also had a bundle of clothes in the crook of her other arm, a pair of shoes in her hand. She set the mirror down.

"Look," she said with a strange tone.

Parker blinked and looked in the mirror. The first thing he noticed was the bright red eyes he now had. He tried to poke one to check for a contact of some sort, only succeeding causing his eye to water. Then he noticed how, despite his tattered and bloody uniform, his injuries were completely gone. His skin was strange, paler than it should have been, but still darker than either Carlisle's or Alice's. The sunlight that was streaming through the windows had hit his hand, it _sparkling_.

His jaw dropped. "How? Why?" He rubbed at his hand furiously with the other, trying to rub off whatever they'd put on his skin. It didn't work, the skin still sparkling.

Alice handed Parker the bundle, him grabbing it. Alice still had a pair of shoes, shined and patent leather. "Change into this. You have to look your best for your first hunt, after all, and I won't take no for an answer." Parker glared at her. "You don't want your uniform covered in more blood, do you?"

"I don't care." He handed it back to her rather roughly, though she didn't budge at the force he used. "As far as I know, you two are completely insane."

Parker turned again to the door and opened it up. He blinked when the door ripped off its' hinges. "...Uh..." He was still confused about a lot of what had just happened and angry with how unhelpful, not to mention batshit insane, this guy and his supposed "daughter" were being.

"Newborn vampires... that is to say, newly turned vampires, often do not know their own strength," Carlisle said. "It's fine, just put the door down and we'll fix it up later."

"Don't talk to me like a child. I'm older than you," Parker said. It was getting to be irritating, that slightly patronizing tone that Carlisle had.

"You were turned when you were older physically, yes, but I've been alive since 1640."

Parker rolled his eyes and headed outside, dropping the door on the ground. There was a winding dirt road that disappeared into the trees. He kept walking, heading down the road. He tried swallowing his saliva again, it still doing nothing to the pain.

"You need to keep him away from the highway," Parker heard Alice say. "There's a couple that has had their car break down. I'm going to find Emmett and Jasper..."

"I'll need to talk to Esme about this, as she has been gone for the past few days and she'll want to know about a new person joining us."

"Okay, got it."

A/N:

"Merda" means "shit" in Italian.

Yep. He's a sparklepire now. The artwork was of Parker having sparkles around him, thus the comments a friend of mine made about it.

Also, I edited some aspects of Carlisle's characterization from the original draft of this, due to some information I found out from listening to a sporking of the official guidebook done by Das Mervin. I would just like to say thanks to her for that and to tell you guys that you should go read her fanfiction on this site if you like Supernatural and are anti-Twilight. (I highly recommend "Wedding Crashers" in particular.)

-The Sleep-Deprived Writer


	3. Chapter 3

Parker continued down the path as he heard Alice's footsteps fade in the distance. Carlisle's footsteps crunched behind him on the dirt. He frowned. "Now what?"

"Just head that way," Carlisle said. Parker glanced back, still angry with this man, but he needed the directions to wherever the hell he had to go. The man was so adamant and, now that he thought of it, the thought of warm blood, dripping down from someone's wounds was (eerily) sounding like a good thing. He shook his head and trotted off, heading into the forest.

He tried not to have his head spin as he moved through the forest. He felt strangely fast and the way he was now picking up random snatches of detail had bothered him. It was disorienting to beat the band, his throat still aching and his senses being overwhelmed by the detail and all the _noise_. Birds chirping being amplified, rustles and cracks as snakes and rodents went about their business, deer of some kind somewhere-

Deer?

Parker shook his head and focused on the sound, trying to distract himself from the current sensory overload. It seemed to work earlier, when Carlisle and Alice were talking to him. If he could just pay attention to the deer...

He slunk through the forest, the sky overcast again. He glanced around, noticing a larger deer between two trees. It was grazing, its' head lowered. It'd be an easy kill. As he stepped forward, a twig snapped under his foot.

It looked up at him, its' ear twitching. It's tail twitched back and forth quickly, it slowly finishing chewing its' grass. "It's okay, little deer..." Parker said in a quiet manner. His voice sounded distant to him. It bolted away. "Merda!"

Parker sprinted after the deer. He was surprised at the realization that, though he was running through the woods, he was able to avoid all the trees and was somehow catching up to the deer. This was unnatural, whatever was going on with him.

He tackled the deer, snapping its' neck with his arms and biting into it. The blood was warm, some of it dripping down his chin as he drank it greedily, the pain and burning in his throat slowly dissipating. He licked the fur around the bite, continuing to drink the blood as it dribbled out, tearing deeper into the flesh with his teeth when the blood coagulated. More blood welled out of the newer wound, him drinking it eagerly.

Parker, once he got as much blood as he could from the deer, stood up and wiped off his mouth with his hand. He'd made a mess, blood all down his front, soaking through his clothes. He wiped his hand on his pants and glanced around. Where was he? How far did he go out?

He started walking again, the pain still in the back of his throat, but it distinctly dulled by the blood. He also felt less weak than before.

Parker walked down a path that he'd noticed, it well-worn from walking. Maybe he could head back to Forks and talk to Charlie? Maybe he'd know what the hell was going on? As Parker went down it, he heard the sounds of footsteps along the path. It wasn't the sound of animals, though. He got off the path and hid in the trees, crouching behind a reasonably-sized pine tree.

A young man with brownish hair was walking along the path. He looked like he was in his teens. He was probably one of the local kids that was going to graduate from the nearby high school. He had a compass out, hiking along.

Parker stood up, the way the wind shifting blowing a smell toward him. It was tantalizing, like a plate of fine meat. The pain in his throat flared at the smell, prickling uncomfortably. This would be about the time his stomach would growl, if it weren't already full.

Maybe he could limp out, act like he was seriously injured and needed medical attention (the ripped and bloodstained clothes, along with the bare feet, would help), then bite into the kid's neck when he wasn't looking... Much easier than chasing the kid down...

He realized what he was thinking and stepped back, a flood of horror hitting him.

Oh, god, he wanted to eat some kid. Some kid who just happened to cross his path. Parker turned around and ran deeper into the woods, trying to put as much distance as he could between himself and that boy.

He was panicking now. Why would he see normal people as a meal? Why did they smell so damn good? Unless Carlisle wasn't lying?

The trees were a blur around him, him not paying any mind to where he was going as long as it was away from there.

Something, though, was making a lot of noise. It was a steady sound, four beats in a rhythm that matched his footsteps. Something large slammed into him and he fell to the ground with it. He tried turned around as best he could underneath this large creature, failing to see what it was.

Whatever it was, was damn strong, him wiggling about under it, eventually getting a glance at it. It was large, its' gray fur very fluffy. It let him go and he scurried up, turning to face it. It snarled once, then he stared as the wolf (_wolf? it's bigger than a car!_ he thought) turned into a young woman.

Leah.

He took a step back, ready to bolt if he wanted to try to eat her, too.

"Jesus, I thought you were a nomad," she said. She seemed to ignore how she was completely naked. (He barely noticed and didn't care all that much, as he was currently panicking.) He didn't really think she smelled like food, but it wasn't unpleasant.

"I want to eat people..." He glanced away, his voice shaking as he said so.

Leah gave him a look, her eyes wide. "Uh, wait... The Cullens didn't... I mean, Jacob had told the rest of the pack how Carlisle said you were under their wing now and one of the bloodsuckers... Did he tell you what happened to you at all?"

"Yeah, but I thought he was crazy! I woke up from a bear attack to a man claiming I was a vampire! And what kind of vampire _glitters_ in sunlight, anyway?" Parker made a gesture with his hands in sheer frustration at the absurdity of the situation.

"Is there even one of the Cullens watching you at all to make sure you aren't going to kill anyone?" One of her eyebrows was raised and her eyes managed to go even wider. She was speaking slower that usual, as if to make absolutely sure that he understood.

"Nobody went with me. Some little girl Alice went to find Emmett and Jasper, whoever they are... And Carlisle said something about going to find someone named Esme." Parker took another step backward, debating whether or not he should run. "So, wait, there's werewolves?"

"Sort of... Members of my tribe, when there's vampires in the area, will start becoming werewolves, more like shapeshifters, if we're in certain bloodlines. We guard the area so that people aren't killed off. But, anyway, I'm still confused about why nobody went with you."

He stared at her. "Why...?"

"This place is a popular hiking area, especially at this time of year and we protect our tribe. Why the hell wouldn't they do that? Look, I'm gonna be taking you back to where they live and ask what the fuck is going on. Unless you know where you're going?"

Parker shook his head. He'd been turned around enough in this forest and the lack of a visible sun wasn't helping.

"Alright then, come with me."

Parker jumped back as Leah exploded in front of him, fur flying every. She was now a giant wolf again. She turned to the north and walked in front of him, gesturing with her head to follow him. She then took off, him following behind her. The trees were again a blur. He wondered how fast they were going.

In a short time, they were back at a large house. Parker blinked, not realizing how much he missed when he was so angry and thirsty earlier. It was bright white along all the walls, having at least three stories. There were a lot of windows along the sides as well. It gave him the impression of them having quite a bit of money (which made a bit of sense, if they didn't have to buy food and they'd been living for decades).

Leah was trotting in front of him, her ears slightly lowered as she walked over to another werewolf, one with dark brown fur, a good deal larger than her. Parker gave both of them a confused look.

Leah transformed back to her human form, along with the other werewolf, who turned out to be a young Native American man. He crossed his arms. "Leah, you attacked him!"

"I thought he was a nomad, Jacob, the way he was running. Then I realized who he was and let him go!" Leah said. "And, anyway, why the hell wasn't anyone watching him? Where the hell are the other Cullens?"

"Watch your language around Renesme," Jacob said. Parker gave an extremely confused look to both of them, assuming that Renesme was someone around here. He glanced around.

There was a quiet throat-clearing behind him, highly pitched. Parker turned around and saw a young girl, probably around the age of nine or so, maybe a bit younger. She walked past him and walked to Jacob, giving Parker a strange look as she did so. He did think she would have a point in finding him odd, as he was currently bedraggled, covered in blood, and wearing torn clothes with bits of twigs stuck in it.

But there was something off about her eyes. She looked rather pale and her eyes were brown, but there was something uncanny about the look in her eyes. It was too adult for his liking. No little girl should've looked like that.

"Look, I know they're gonna be your in-laws one day, but that doesn't stop how stupid it was that they let a newborn vampire run around without someone watching him. That's just asking for trouble. Hell, I'm worried that he ate someone..."

"I didn't eat anyone. I attacked a deer," Parker said. "Nearly attacked some young man, though."

There was a tap on his shoulder. Parker turned around and looked. It was starting to worry him how much people were sneaking up on him lately. It was a man behind him, also extremely pale, who was also notably burly. Parker laughed for a moment, thinking that he resembled Chris in some way, albeit much younger. "Sorry... you remind me of someone I know."

"Name's Emmett," he said. He held out his hand. Parker shook it. "We should probably let them deal with their issues. These two look ready to tear my head off."

Emmett walked up the path to the house. Parker followed, hearing snatches of the conversation that the two were saying, between his paying attention to them and all the other stuff that was going on. "-if he killed someone? What on earth would-"

His attention wandered again, listening to some birds in their nest twenty feet away. This hypersensitive hearing was getting to be a pain in the ass, if his attention span was like a little kid's again.

Emmett took off his shoes and plopped down on the couch in the living room. The mirror was still out, along with the set of clothes. "Mind if I change in here?"

"Dude, I don't care. Just as long as you don't have a random boner or whatever, 'cause I'm not interested. Married and the wife and I are happy."

Parker frowned at the word choice. There wouldn't be any way that they would've known about who he was interested in. And he wasn't one for burly men, anyway. He quickly stripped. Though he was fine with how he was mostly proper in terms of appearance, he didn't like the sick, pale look he had. It didn't look right, like he was on his deathbed from tuberculosis.

Parker quickly got into the new set of clothing, noting the strange texture. It seemed to be some sort of silk for the shirt and pants. He frowned again. It wasn't that he was ungrateful, it was just how the girl Alice wanted him to use this instead of his normal clothes to go hunting and get covered in blood. It was so... wasteful. It wasn't like when he was growing up at all and it bothered him.

Emmett was watching a TV show and Parker frankly didn't care much for it. He yawned and headed up the stairs. He just wanted some sleep now. He opened the door to what he presumed was a spare room (due to the lack of a sort of smell and lack of personal effects). He shut the door and laid down on the bed, closing his eyes.

A/N:

I'm trying to work with the canon as best I can, but this is getting to be a pain. I realize that Parker hasn't lost all rational thought. Though the newborns are hyped up as being solely obsessed with going "om nom nom" on people, Bella Swan, a viewpoint characters who end up a newborn in the series, isn't really all that obsessed with the pain and thirst. There's a difference between telling and showing.

I am not sure about Bree Tanner, as I've not read that novella, either, but I did check out the Twilight wiki to be sure. Given the description of how Bree and Diego act in the book, despite being newborns, it also implies that newborns aren't as completely mindless as the characters kept saying.

Also, I headcanon Parker as bisexual. Given the Cullens being from different generations and from regions that would have had problems with homophobia at the time, I would imagine they'd be extremely uncomfortable with anyone who wasn't straight. (Yet they're fine with/don't react to pedophilia, child grooming, and murder, which is their _canonical_ reaction to that stuff, by the way.)

-The Sleep-Deprived Writer


	4. Chapter 4

Parker laid on the bed, his eyes still closed. Even though he wanted to, he just could not fall asleep. He heard, downstairs, muffled voices, but he wasn't sure what they were saying. The sound of a few electronics whirring was also present, along with footsteps. There may have been a howl or two in the distance, but he wasn't sure where it was coming from (_maybe the werewolves? _he thought).

Parker was starting to wonder if he was in Hell. He was now something that ate people. He'd spent his whole life trying to protect others, including protecting them from the undead, and he was now one of the undead himself. The irony was staggering.

The prickle at the back of his throat was uncomfortable, yes, but it was still stable.

Hell, what day was it? Did the people of Forks and the BSAA think he was another victim of whatever (_or whoever_, he reminded himself, as there turned out to be vampires and werewolves) was running around killing people? And the year wait before he could be among others again...

He frowned and got up, irritated with how he just couldn't sleep. He walked out of the room. His mood was not improving the longer he stayed here. And that stuff with Emmett earlier bothered him. There'd be no way in hell that he'd know anything about that.

As he walked to the living room, he noticed that his mood was lightening a bit, but something was unnatural about it. He knew he should have still been pissed off (and he wanted to be so, actually), but it was like he couldn't. Parker frowned and looked around. Emmett was still in the living room, watching an international news channel, his arm around the shoulder of a beautiful young blonde woman that was about Emmett's age. Renesmee was sitting on the floor, reading a book of some sort.

Near the front door, there was a man with blond hair, a strange look on his face. Parker immediately noticed the scars and youth the man had. He looked like he'd been through several wars, the way he was scarred so much across his face and neck. It scared him slightly. The fear dissipated in a second, the man frowning.

He might as well be polite. "Uh, hello..."

"Hello. I'm Jasper. You're Parker?"

Parker scratched the back of his head. This was incredibly awkward and he didn't like how his emotions were acting so unnatural. Even the unease from how he wasn't feeling normal was dissipating, which in turn bothered him even more, which then dissipated, forming a vicious cycle. The back of his throat prickled uncomfortably. "Yeah... How many of you are there?"

"Pardon?" Jasper stepped forward, the scars appearing quite different due to the change in the way the light hit his face. Parker suppressed a shudder at the thought of the horrors he must've seen.

"Well, there's you, Emmett, Emmett's wife, Alice, Renesmee, Carlisle, Esme, unless Esme is Emmett's-"

"No," the woman said. "I'm Rosalie. And I don't understand why Carlisle turned you. You look sloven and scruffy."

Parker raised an eyebrow. The irritation that he would've felt disappeared quickly. He was really starting to worry now. "Are there any more of you?"

"Edward and Bella, who are Renesmee's parents. And I assume you aren't counting the werewolves?" He had an impassive expression.

"Well, uh, my job, the reason why I was out here in the first place, was to investigate the missing people in the area and the homicides. Now that I know there are vampires, it goes a bit without saying that you guys are suspects, too."

Jasper sighed. "You haven't been told much about being a vampire, have you?"

"No." Parker shrugged.

"Let's take this outside. Rosalie's getting irritated with our talking." Jasper walked out the front (the door was still ripped off its' hinges and currently propped up against the entryway's wall). Parker followed him.

"Wait, how'd you know that?"

Jasper gave Parker a look. "Some of us have gifts that are amplifications of our human traits in life. I was very charismatic and able to influence others, so I'm able to feel others' emotions and can manipulate them."

"So, this whole time-"

"I've been keeping you calm. Newborn vampires tend to be extremely violent," Jasper said. They looked out to the sky. It wasn't dark yet, the sky still somewhat overcast and various shades of oranges and pinks and purples.

Parker frowned. "I can see why."

"We've all been there at one point or another. But, for your investigation, though it will probably not pan out due to certain issues, vampires that drink human blood have red eyes. Vampires that drink animal blood exclusively have yellow eyes. All of our family has yellow eyes except for you, because newborns still have blood from their human life in their system."

"Let me guess, I won't be able to tell anyone this because vampires are probably a secret, right?"

"If you reveal vampires to the world, the Volturi will rip you apart and light you on fire."

"That sounds..." Parker cringed and glanced at Jasper. "That sounds barbaric."

"It's necessary to kill a vampire. Nothing else works."

Parker stared at Jasper in disbelief. "Wait, what?"

"We're nearly indestructible, so our deaths require a certain level of extremity," Jasper said. He, in turn, frowned.

"...Who are the Volturi?"

"They are an order that guard the secrecy of vampires. Humans would have all of us exterminated, even those of us who abstain from human blood... I remember hearing in passing that your surname was Luciani. The Volturi live in Italy, so I am curious of whether or not you've been to Volterra."

"No. Lived in Napoli. ...It's called Naples in English. About 485 kilometers, I should say 300 miles, away." Parker was trying not to freak out again. Vampires in Italy? This was getting ridiculous. This had to be some sort of strange dream. The well of panic died away slowly. "...Uh, why'd you do that?"

"You panicking is the last thing anyone needs right now." Jasper frowned again. "We are having enough problems as it is with the rogue in the area that we need to find and you adding to the body count won't help matters.

"Ah... Wait, you said vampires had red eyes or yellow eyes, right? Does that mean Renesmee's human?" In the back of his mind, there was the thought that something wasn't right.

"No, she's a human-vampire hybrid. A few years back, the Volturi though she was an immortal child-"

Parker gave him a confused look.

"A young child that is turned into a vampire. It's illegal to do so, because those children never gain control of themselves. When they throw a tantrum, they left whole towns destroyed. They thought she was one and amassed, preparing to execute us for it. Things, luckily, did not escalate."

Parker shook his head. There was so much information to take in, but he was irritated by one thing. The other vampires that'd he'd seen so far, were all either in their late teens or early twenties.

"We were all turned at that time and we don't age," a voice said behind them. Parker turned around, looking at the man who'd said it. It was another vampire who looked like he was in his late teens. He had bronze hair and gold eyes, with a vague air of self-importance. Hanging off of his arm was a young woman with dark hair, also with gold eyes, who looked somewhat familiar, like he'd seen her before somewhere.

They were both eerily pale and he didn't like it. Everyone, aside from the werewolves, that he met since the attack were so sickly pale. It was unnerving, regardless of whether or not they were vampires. Hell, he was worried about his own reflection. It looked so _unnatural_.

"What?" Parker said.

Jasper lightly chuckled. "I'm going to head inside now." He stalked off, his steps quiet.

"I can read minds, so I answered your question," Edward said.

Parker didn't pay much attention to their clothing. Something about this kid bothered him. He seemed so smug. If it weren't for the vampirism, he thought, the kid would've probably gotten a little... towel snapping, if he were in the BSAA. Parker rolled his eyes. _Vaffanculo_, he thought.

"...I understand Italian. Please don't be rude."

Parker gave him a skeptical look. "Of course... And you two are?" He let just a bit of sarcasm enter his tone. Great, a mind-reader who could understand what he said in another language.

"Edward Cullen." Edward held out his hand, a slightly disdainful look on his face. Parker shook it, rather irritable with this whole affair.

"Parker Luciani."

Parker glanced to Bella. "Bella Swan-Cullen." She held out her hand and he shook it.

"So, uh..." Parker blinked. "Swan?"

"Yes, what of my maiden name?" The way she held herself also bothered him. It seemed so cocky and superior.

"Are you related to Charlie Swan?"

"Yes. He's my father." She seemed a bit off-put by this to him, if the slight shift in her position was any indication. "How do you know him?"

"I was going to work with him on the investigation involving all those people being killed. He said he had a daughter. So you're her?" He lightened up a bit. Charlie was a nice guy, so maybe his daughter wouldn't be so... awkward? The way Emmett acted earlier still bothered him, so he was starting to wonder if Emmett had any sort of special skill.

"He doesn't," Edward said. "What makes you think that?"

"Get out of my head." Parker frowned. "And I was wondering if he could know something that someone hasn't told them. Though, now, I have another theory."

Bella said, "So, how do you like being a vampire so far?"

"I don't like it," Parker said. He was keeping his tone as calm as possible, because of the warning that Jasper said about new vampires having problems with their temper.

"Why not?" The tone she had bothered him, like she simply couldn't fathom why not. "You're stronger, more graceful, can't get injured, don't sleep, you're more beautiful, and you can't die."

Parker stared at her, dumbfounded. He recovered himself and started using a bit of sarcasm. "Yeah, except for the part where you want to kill and eat people. And I don't think it's beautiful to look like you have severe anemia." He crossed his arms. "Wait, don't sleep? Better have a hobby then, I suppose, otherwise eternal life's going get boring fast..." he said, with just a bit more sarcasm.

A/N:

Vaffanculo: Literally "go take it up the ass," it being the rough equivalent of "Fuck you."

Fun fact: Blonde is feminine and blond is masculine.

There's also a reason why Parker's much weaker than the average sparklepire and his senses aren't uber-heightened compared to how Bella describes things in Breaking Dawn after she gets turned (aside from how that would lead to "god-mode character" and "boring purple prose," respectively). The way something was tacked on as an afterthought to fix a plothole had a lot of potential...

-The Sleep-Deprived Writer


	5. Chapter 5

Bella looked like she had been slapped to the face, then her expression changed to a scowl. She took a deep breath. "You'll learn, in time, that it's much better than being a human." Parker gave her a slightly skeptical look.

There were footsteps across the lawn in different directions. The sky was now completely dark, the clouds dissipating to reveal a waxing crescent moon. Stars dotted the sky. Despite this, he noticed that he could still see everything clearly. He glanced around, noticing that there were several young men (_still kids_, he noted) walking across the lawn, barefoot and wearing only small trousers.

The exception of the group was a young girl, probably six or so, who was wearing some more normal clothing. He was rather confused about her inclusion in the group, due to how young she was. (The way the wind was, he had no indication whatsoever what their scents were.)

Leah, who was apart from the group, walked toward them, a scowl on her face. She was in a pair of trousers, along with a t-shirt. Bella, if it were possible, had an even more sour expression on her face. Edward, on the other hand, was looking downright nasty.

Parker blinked a few times, a little confused about what the hell was going on. "Hello, Leah," Bella said, her tone cold.

"Bella. Edward. Hey, Parker." Leah had a lighter tone while speaking to him, Parker noticed.

"What are you doing here?"

"The pack has been invited to your guys' place for tonight. Alice was chattering about some movie night. Remember?"

"Oh... Right," Edward said. "I suppose we should head inside, then?"

"You guys can go ahead. I just want to enjoy the nice weather," Leah said. Edward and Bella both headed across the lawn. Parker looked back and forth between Leah and the other two. "Look, you can head in if you want, but I need to talk to you about something and it pertains to you."

"Go ahead."

"Well, we have to get out of hearing range and Edward's mind-reading range..." Leah stepped back from Parker, quickly taking off her clothes and tying them to her leg with a piece of string. Another explosion of fur later and there was a giant gray wolf standing in front of him, the bundle of clothes still tied to her leg.

She gestured with her head out to the north of the house, then started running. Parker followed, keeping up as best as he could. They were going off any sort of path and there seemed to be no animals across the path they were on, probably scared away by a giant werewolf and a vampire running by. Parker was vaguely wondering what this was about.

About ten minutes later, she stopped, transforming back. Parker looked away to give her some privacy. A bit later, she chuckled and said, "Relax, I'm dressed."

She sat down on the ground, Parker following suit, sitting across from her. "Okay, so what is this about?"

"The pack members and the Cullens, for the most part, are going to probably treat you like shit. Basically, when you were being turned- which is against the treaty my tribe has with the Cullens, by the way- Edward heard one of your thoughts about you were in Hell because you were gay the first night when you were being transformed."

Parker sighed. "I'm bisexual, and that includes men and my current partner is male, so..."

"Let me guess, used to this?" She had a slightly pained look.

"Italy is not exactly open-minded about that sort of thing." Parker listened to the environment around them. The animals were slowly moving back out, realizing that they weren't going to be trampled or ripped apart.

"Well, considering how they grew up in whatever time, it would make a bit of sense that they're iffy about it, though Alice seems to now think you're her fashion buddy or something... But what pisses me off about it is that they're perfectly fine with the imprinting and their leech buddies drinking human blood a while back."

"Wait, what?"

"Well, imprinting is where a werewolf... shapeshifter... whatever the fuck we are... It's where the werewolf goes absolutely crazy over someone they see and it's supposed to be their soulmate."

Parker raised an eyebrow at this. Though he could be a bit of a romantic type himself when he wanted, even he knew that love at first sight was generally bullshit and relying on that instead of connecting to the other person wouldn't work in the long run. "Uh... That's incredibly childish, but I don't see how-"

"Two members of the pack imprinted on young children. Quil imprinted on Claire when she was two. Did you see that little girl earlier that was with the pack? He imprinted on her. And Jacob, the pack's leader, imprinted on Renesmee right after she was born. They hover over the girls, doting on them and raising them, basically."

"So, for nine years-" Parker stared at her, a wave of horror hitting him again. It was too much like the book Lolita for his liking (made worse by how it was_ actually happening_). The way his stomach churned made him feel like he was going to purge all the blood he'd drunk earlier in the day.

"Actually, three," Leah said. She looked like she was about to be ill as well, her face gaining a strange sort of pallor. "She ages quickly and she was able to talk at a few weeks old. Once she looks of age- where she'll stop aging- she and Jacob, along with Claire and Quil when Claire's of age, will end up screwing to have a bunch of kids..."

"And they have no problems with it?" Parker said, his eyes wide. "And their parents have no problems with it?"

"Yeah, despite how they have problems with... Wait, how old is your partner?"

"He's 34. I'm about 6 years older than him." Parker scratched the back of his head. He never really thought about the age difference up until now. He supposed it could be worse.

"Well, he's already older than everyone here, physically speaking. Sometimes, I wonder mentally speaking, too..." Leah was starting to regain a bit of color in her cheeks. The slight change in subject was also easing Parker's nausea. "But the way both the Cullens and the pack keep talking about you, it's like they think you want to hump all the guys into submission."

"...I have standards, I don't want to cheat, and they all look like teenagers. _I look old enough to be their father_." Parker scowled and his emphasis on his words changed slightly.

"Don't shoot the messenger. I'm warning you because they've been badmouthing you behind your back." Leah gave him a shrug.

A mouse scurried around, between the two of them. Parker glanced at it as it went off into the underbrush.

"So, uh, how's your... boyfriend?" She seemed to have a bit of hesitance as she said it. He gave her a confused look. "...Not used to saying that to a guy."

"He's been busy as of late. We travel a lot for our jobs, so sometimes we don't see each other for a good amount of time... And I assume I can't see him anymore, because I'll then try to eat him, won't I?"

"New vampires aren't normally very good at controlling themselves. I hate the term newborn, mostly because they still can control themselves, but new vampires are so hyped up as being unable to control their thirst that I think they start to believe it. Like the term newborn implies the inability to control oneself, like a child, you know? You've been pretty tame for a new one, actually. The only others like that were Carlisle and Bella."

"Why?"

"Well, from what the leeches keep saying, it's because Carlisle's compassionate and because he figured out that drinking animal blood works, too. And Bella... I have no idea why about her. You'd have to talk to her about it." Leah frowned slightly. A bird called in the distance. "And I'm not sure about you. Hell, none of the others are sure about you, from what I can tell."

"Leeches?" Parker said. He raised an eyebrow at this.

"Yeah, back before Jacob imprinted, we called the vampires leeches, because leeches suck blood and it's an insult. For one of them, you're actually not too bad, probably because you don't have a stick up your ass, though I'm still bothered by something. I could easily pin you down earlier, which isn't normal. Vampires are stronger than werewolves, and new ones especially so, so that's led to some comments from Quil that have to do with you being into guys."

Parker blinked, then put his hand to his forehead. "Who one is 'into' wouldn't have anything to do with that..." Parker looked back up to her. "Would it?"

"I was saying that maybe it had something to do with whatever special skill you have that has to do with being a vampire, but I was ignored." Leah had a blank expression on her face.

"Why?"

She looked away, to some point over his shoulder, her eyes narrowing for a moment. "...It's a long story."

Parker nodded. "Okay, so you said earlier about their friends eating people?"

"Back when Renesmee- she's called Nessie normally- was born, the Volturi were preparing to execute both the Cullens because of her existance and our pack, because they thought we were a different type of werewolf. They got a bunch of bloodsuckers up here who drink human blood and they were protecting them as they went off killing and eating people." Leah had a slight trace of bitterness in her voice.

"Why would they-?" Parker let out a growl. _So they allowed people to kill others, huh? And they have two pedophiles with them? _he thought.

"To protect the spawn. We were originally going to kill her, but then Jacob imprinted on her, so we haven't been able to do anything ever since. And it gets old because he's nearly always by her side, so I'm stuck doing most of the grunt work, despite him being Alpha.

"Hell, I'm not back at La Push right now because I'm worried about you. You got thrown into this whole mess and they don't seem to care all that much for you. Luckily, Sam's pack is there, so it's not like they're unguarded. And this vampire, whoever has been attacking the humans in the area, we can't seem to track them down. No matter how much we try, we never seem to quite get the scent." Leah looked up and Parker followed suit. A crow had landed on a nearby branch.

"You think it was a vampire?" Parker said, looking back to her.

"It looks exactly like a vampire kill. Smells like it, too, but it's strange. It's like the vampire can somehow hide their exact scent so we can never quite pick up the trail, though we can smell it on their kills. Unless you still think it's those Ooze things?"

"At this rate, I don't know what to believe. It's a lot to take in." Parker rubbed his temples, closing his eyes. "And my colleagues probably think I'm dead."

"Yeah, Charlie's beating himself up over it, honestly. He blames himself for not insisting someone go with you and he thinks you got killed, too." Leah glanced away again awkwardly. "My mom's not happy and it makes talking to him even more awkward."

"He doesn't know about-?"

"No. Never pushed for an explanation when visiting his daughter. And we can't tell him, because the Volturi will want him either turned or killed..." Leah stretched and stood up. "Well, you see, this is somewhat of a problem. As much as I hate the Cullens, the Volturi are no better. They're fond of killing everyone that breaks any of their laws."

Parker got up as well. "What are their laws?"

"You'll have to ask one of the other bloodsuckers for a better explanation, but there are a few I know of. Don't fraternize with what are called 'true' werewolves, don't make immortal children... Do you know what-?" Leah started to walk farther north, deeper into the woods.

"Yeah, Jasper told me." Parker followed her. The burn in his throat was getting stronger again. He was starting to wonder how often he'd have to feed.

"...What else...? Oh, right. They have this rule about new vampires needing to be guarded while they're taught, so they don't end up killing anyone." Leah continued walking. "Which is what pissed me off. If the Volturi were to find out, they'd probably kill you. Hell, they're probably preparing to come here again because of the stupid vampire that keeps killing all those people."

Parker looked and listened. Maybe he could snag a quick meal? A few birds would be fine for the moment. He darted away, heading east.

"Hey!" Leah took off after him. He could hear her as she followed him, her footsteps turning into deeper thuds. He was looking for something else, dodging her as she tried to pin him down again. He turned and headed further north, looking for a deer to bite into. Leah was still following him again.

Parker abruptly stopped as they'd gotten to a small open area. There was another deer. In the distance, the sound of traffic could be heard. Leah smacked into him, her in wolf form, and turned back to normal. "Give me some warning, at least, if you're thirsty," she said.

Parker ignored her, staring at a deer that was in the distance. He prowled around for the best angle, so that it would be less likely to notice him. Leah stood nearby, he assumed looking out for any humans that could've stumbled upon them.

There was one with a bit of a limp, its' leg awkwardly set. Parker darted after it, it looking up. Many of the other deer bolted, retreating back into the forest. He bit into it, drinking the blood that dripped from its' wound. He could hear Leah walking up to him, but he wasn't paying the slightest bit of attention as he continued drinking, the burn in his throat easing up.

"Parker." He glanced to her, then went back to drinking the blood. "We need to get out of here."

A/N:

Yeah. Leah and Parker would be friends, I imagine. They're in the same boat, despite how Leah's a shapeshifter and Parker, in this story, ended up a vampire. This would also be despite the age gap, where Leah's in her twenties and Parker's forty.

(Basically, the mix of fanon and canon is that Leah is basically the group scapegoat and she's noticing that the pattern is showing up with Parker now as well.)

-The Sleep-Deprived Writer


	6. Chapter 6

Parker continued to drink the blood of the deer, the words and tone that Leah used barely registering. Leah sighed, a note of exasperation in it. "Look, there's this treaty and I don't think you fall into one of the exceptions. Because of the split off with the two packs, both leaders have to agree to the exceptions and I'm pretty sure this time that..."

Parker stood up, letting the deer's body fall to the ground. He looked at Leah, still a bit out of it from feeding.

She glanced around. "Do you honestly not hear anything?"

He shook his head. He still wanted to continue, despite how blood was currently leaking out of the deer's wounds and onto the ground, mixing with the dirt and making it undrinkable.

"Jesus Christ, it's like you lost most of the enhancements that come with being a vampire. A vampire can hear as well as a werewolf..." Leah gave him a stare, her eyes wide. "Look, we just need to get out of here as soon as-"

A large, jet black wolf leaped out from a rock outcropping, hitting the ground with a loud thud. Its' teeth were bared and it was growling lowly. Parker cocked his head to the side and blinked. She turned around. "Sam, calm down. He's with the Cullens."

The wolf turned back into a human. He was another extremely tall man, just barely an adult from what Parker could tell. There was a look in his eyes that unsettled Parker.

"He's got red eyes."

"He's newly turned," Leah said. She held up her hands. "I met him back when he was human. He was investigating the area because of the vampire attacks because someone thought it had to do with biological warfare. Something happened involving a bear and Carlisle turned him a few days ago."

"Why are you with him?" Sam said. He crossed his arms and looked at her skeptically. There were rustling sounds and padding footsteps nearby. Parker glanced around. There were other wolves, all extremely large, something like five to six feet tall at the shoulders.

"For some reason, we don't know why, he's weaker than other vampires, I can tackle him and keep him pinned. And I seem to have been assigned his guard duty." Leah shook her head. "Still reeks like a bloodsucker, though."

"...And if the Cullens and Jacob still found out you talked about vampires like that-"

"Sam, we aren't seeing each other any more and we aren't in the same pack. Don't try to act like you can boss me around," Leah in turn crossed her arms. "Anyway, doesn't change how badly they smell sometimes."

Parker gave her an annoyed look. She glanced back to address him. "...Vampires have a smell that attracts humans to them and makes shapeshifters want to be sick." Leah turned to face Sam again. "He's _really_ clueless right now, okay?"

"It still doesn't give them the right to break the treaty whenever they want. The only exceptions were whenever pack members had a personal stake in the matter. Turning a man, even to save his life, goes against the treaty."

"What, so you're going to kill him? For once, there's actually a vampire in the area who _isn't _a condescending prick and doesn't think they're better than everyone else."

A snarl from one of the other wolves made Parker glance over to them. He gave the one who did that a confused look. "The treaty says that we reveal the Cullens for what they are for this crime."

"Problem is the bloodsuckers were talking about the Volturi coming here soon. You reveal the vampires to the humans and they'll execute the members of the tribe or turn everyone if you do that."

Sam opened his mouth.

Leah cut him off, saying, "Look, even if you try to fight them, it won't end like last time with that whole 'mental battle' crap Bella keeps going on about. We don't have random bloodsuckers from different parts of the world back here, okay? By the time the Cullens would try to get help, and they won't because it'd be because of you revealing them, the Volturi would already be here.

"We got a rogue vampire already running around and we need to find them first, okay? As much as I hate how they randomly broke the treaty again and turned some guy without his consent, we have to deal with the vampire that's actually killing people. Then we can deal with the morons, but we need a plan first," Leah said.

Sam frowned. "I don't like this." He gave a sideways glance toward Parker. Parker gave him a confused look. Sam then glanced back and forth between Parker and Leah for a bit. "...Since when have you defended a vampire?" he said, crossing his arms, a slightly skeptical look on his face.

"When the guy got thrown into the mess like all of us did back when we started phasing. He had nothing whatsoever to do with anything involving this and he isn't a complete jackass," Leah said. Parker didn't like the tension, so he glanced up to the moon. He could hear a few of the animals scurrying nearby.

"Look, it's late. I need to take him back to the Cullens and head back to La Push. And you guys, in the time you spent fussing over him-" She pointed with her thumb to Parker. "Could've been searching for the actual vampire that's been eating people."

Sam turned into a wolf again and bounded off, the other wolves following him. "Okay, come on, bloodsucker. Need to get you back to your mommy and daddy," Leah said, a hint of snark in her voice. She transformed again and bounded away, Parker following after her.

A/N:

I don't even know at this point. This one was shorter than the others. Part of it had to do with pacing.

-The Sleep-Deprived Writer


	7. Chapter 7

Parker, upon getting back to the house, trudged back up to the room where he was earlier. This was going to be a long night, if he couldn't sleep and didn't have much to do. If one doesn't sleep, what does one do with all that spare time?

Especially since the others were all busy. From what he could hear, it seemed a lot of them were enjoying their time having sex, the thuds and grunts and moans forming a background noise that drowned out most of the sounds of scurrying animals in the forest. It slightly creeped him out, as they were all teenagers and, though he remembered what it was like to be a teenager, it was still strange. He glanced at the clock. It was five in the morning, so this had been going on for hours. _What, does turning into a vampire increase virility that much?_ he thought. He rolled his eyes.

He stretched out on the bed and turned over, closing his eyes again. It would be nice to be able to sleep again. What did they spend their time on, anyway? He didn't like how little he knew about his hosts, especially since, given the way Leah was talking, they were going to be his foster family for a year (which he did not like the idea of).

As he thought, he closed his eyes. When he came to, there was breathing that wasn't his in the room and a squeal. Someone then grabbed him. His eyes snapped open and he growled, grabbing the person by the arm. It was Alice, dressed in some flashy sort of silk garment. Parker let her go.

"You're strange for a vampire, you know? You were just sleeping." She giggled as she sat on the bed. "I wonder why. Sleeping is impossible for vampires." Alice gave him a puzzled look. "Or it's supposed to be. Dunno how you could. It seems like it's a useless ability, at least."

Parker raised an eyebrow. "What are you doing here?"

"Well, you didn't seem to get out of bed so Carlisle sent me up to check, because Edward was saying he was getting incoherent flashes of memory from you, like a dream of some sort. Something about a red-headed man he'd never seen before?"

Parker would have turned a bit red, were he human. It had more to do with how it was suddenly brought up out of left field than anything else. "And?"

"Is he your sweetheart?"

"That is none of your business, kid." Parker kept his eyebrows raise and had his tone stay flat. He had gripped the blanket in an attempt to prevent him from trying to attack her.

"I'm much older than you. I'm over a century old," Alice said.

"That does not change how my personal life is none of your business," Parker said. He growled, it coming deep from his chest. He was already pissed off because of the whole mess with him being treated like his romantic life was supposed to be public knowledge and treated with derision, meanwhile they condoned murder and had two pedophiles running around.

"Who's the man and who's the woman?" Alice said, still pressing onward.

Parker blinked. "Excuse me?"

"Who's the guy and who's the girl?"

Parker tried taking a swipe at Alice, her dodging out of the way. "He and I are both men, you idiot."

Alice giggled. "Come on. One of you's... what is it called? Pitcher? And the other's catcher, right?"

Parker lunged at her. She dodged out of the way gracefully, him falling to the floor with a thud. "That has nothing to do with anything."

"You're getting really angry."

"That's what happens when you start asking about people's sex lives for no reason whatsoever." Parker got up and growled, him hunching over slightly, like he was ready to spring at her.

"I can see the future, so I'll see your actions before you perform them. It's a bit fuzzy sometimes." Alice pouted and crossed her arms. "You're being difficult."

"Didn't your mother ever tell you that being nosy tends to piss people off?" Parker straightened up and walked out of the room, down the hall. It was bizarre, he noted, that everything in the house, from the bedsheets to the walls being lined with paintings, to even the carpeting being extremely fine. The splendor bothered him on some level. He wasn't used to it and thought it a bit wasteful.

"I don't remember my human life. Woke up one day and I was a vampire." The way Alice skipped alongside him bothered him. He didn't particularly like how perky she was, particularly in regards to how she didn't remember anything. Why on earth would someone still be so happy with not remembering anything about their family or their former life, before they wanted to eat people? He shuddered.

"Fine, did anyone at all tell you it's rude to be nosy, especially about sex lives that do not concern you in any way, shape, or form?" Parker gritted his teeth. He was trying to calm down, but there was still a lot of anger simmering under the surface.

Alice went in front of him and they headed down the stairs. "You never answered my original question. Who's giver and who's receiver?"

"None of your business, kid." Parker glared at her.

"I'm gonna keep bothering you until you tell me," she said, a singsong tone entering her voice.

They walked across a portion of the living room, heading to what looked like the kitchen. Parker blinked. It was very bright, much like the rest of the house. Gleaming white floors, snow white walls, a refrigerator... Parker stared at it. Why on earth would they need a refrigerator if they drank blood?

A woman was standing nearby, a slight smile on her face. She was pretty, though still extremely pale, with dark hair and gold eyes. "Hello, Alice. Hello, Parker." She gave Alice a hug, then Parker. Parker blinked.

She seemed... strangely motherly and it would have been sweet, if it weren't for how he wasn't related to her in any way and how Alice and he were already adults. That made it seem slightly off to him, unnatural in some way. The hair on the back of his neck was standing up. "How are you two doing?"

"Having fun," Alice said.

Parker gave this woman a deadpan look. "Yeah, if you call someone being nosy about your private life 'fun.'"

She gave them a strange smile. It looked slightly pained, if the little twitch in the corner was any indication. "Now, Alice, what have I said about bothering someone about their personal life?" The tone this woman used was like a mother scolding a young child. It sent chills up his spine.

"Don't bother them, Esme." Alice frowned slightly, then bounced back up again, smiling. "Oh, you have to help me with something. I figure you'd have a good set of eyes."

Parker cocked his head to the side. So this was Esme? Parker felt a tug on his arm and Alice dragging him away. He gave her an annoyed look. "Hey!"

"And why do you smell like shapeshifters, anyway? You've been with them a lot, haven't you? I can't see them, so staying with them is a bad idea, okay?"

"Let me-"

"And, before you ask, my visions are entirely based on the choices people make. So, if someone's dead-set on doing something, I'll get a vision of them doing it-"

Parker growled, but continued to listen as she dragged him through the living room. This information might be useful in dealing with whoever killed those people.

"But, if they change their mind, I'll get another vision of them doing something else. I've been a human and I am a vampire, so I can see them. I can't see Renesmee or any of the shapeshifters, because I've never been either a half-human half-vampire hybrid or a shapeshifter." She opened the door to another room, this one on the first floor. "I'm still a little surprised that some of my visions of you are so foggy. You don't have shapeshifter blood in you, do you?"

Parker stared at her, his eyebrow raised and eyes wide. "Not that I know of."

"Maybe that's your power? The ability to avoid being seen?"

Alice let him go and walked (more like skipped, he noted) into the room. He followed. It was also very lavish, with several oil paintings hanging on the walls. He scowled. There was nothing wrong with plain furnishings and they normally lent themselves to being much more homey and welcoming. Something too expensive always made him worry that it wasn't meant to be used, just admired, and this house was filled with that sort of ritzy stuff.

She frowned. "No, that can't be it. Leah was saying something about you saying you avoided killing someone across your path. And it seems-" She was now over on the other side of the room. She opened the door and walked in. Parker followed, slowly. "That you seem to be a lot more calm than other newborns."

Parker stared at this walk in closet. It was enormous, filled to the brim with various clothes, all extremely expensive and made of unusual materials. Colors clashed, contrasting with the walls, floor, and ceiling. Alice glanced back and giggled. "You like it?"

Parker just stared, his mouth hanging open. This was ridiculous. Where the hell were they getting all of this money? Whatever was going on, he didn't like any of this. It was so wasteful. It was so _greedy_. "Uh... truthfully, no."

"Why not?"

"Don't you have _normal clothes_?"

"Now you're being silly, Parker," she said, her tone chipper again. "These are normal clothes."

"I mean, non-expensive clothes. Stuff like jeans and normal t-shirts. Stuff that doesn't cost an arm and a leg."

"Now, where's the fun in that?"

Parker just stared at her. He didn't give any response.

"I thought you'd be into stuff like this."

Parker cleared his throat. It was extremely tempting to try to attack her again. "Look, just because I'm into some men does not mean that I am fond of fashion, okay?" He crossed his arms and gave her a glare, taking a deep breath in and out to calm down. The fabrics had a bunch of strange scents to them, it making Parker wonder how anyone could stand it. "And I'm curious now. Where are you getting all your money? This place is furnished with such expensive items and all your clothes are expensive as well..."

"I use my ability to trade on the stock market. Make a killing, actually," Alice said. She turned away from him and was looking through the clothing. "And Carlisle is a doctor over at the hospital here, so that helps."

Parker stared at her. "Uh, Alice... That's illegal."

"So's a lot of stuff we do. Like birth certificates and such. Speaking of which, we'll need to get one for you. You'll need a new name and new details-"

"No. I'm going to go back to the BSAA after this is all said and done. I'm not just going to let terrorists go free. Or whoever is killing off all these people here."

Alice turned her head and blinked at him. "Really?"

"I'm not going to let a murderer go free because you want me to play dress-up."

"You do realize that, even though you seem to be resistant to-" Parker glanced behind him, hearing a set of footsteps on the carpet. It was Leah, in another pair of shorts and t-shirt. Alice frowned. "What are you doing here?"

"I was wondering where he was." Leah kept her tone quiet. "Something about Esme wanting to talk to him about something?"

A/N:

Alternate character interpretations, ahoy!

-The Sleep-Deprived Writer


	8. Chapter 8

"You're getting your scent in my room." Alice made a shooing gesture.

Leah turned around and walked out, Parker following after her in spite of Alice's protests. "So, what do you think of her?"

"Uh, this is like my personal Hell, honestly."

Leah snorted. "That bad, huh? Normally, bloodsuckers seem to lap this sort of stuff up," she said jokingly.

"I'm serious."

"Oh. Uh, sorry." Leah scratched the back of her head awkwardly. "Also, lied about Esme. She and Carlisle, if you listen carefully, are busy at the moment." She walked around the couch and headed out the front doorframe.

Parker rolled his eyes. He didn't particularly care. "Is there any information of any sort about the sightings, disappearances, and deaths?"

"There were sightings, too?" Leah said. She walked across the lawn, Parker following her.

"Yeah. Charlie mentioned it in passing when we headed out to Forks. Something in my briefing about large shadowy creatures that people insist aren't bears, despite the description they give."

Leah shook her head. "That's happened before a few years ago. Some of us were spotted while doing our jobs and people thought we were bears. It's normally the inexperienced or unlucky ones who get spotted, though."

"So it's werewolves running around?" Parker said. He crossed his arms. "Well, one less thing to worry about, but what else can you tell about the murders?"

"Aside from the usual markers and smells, not that I can tell. Looks like a standard vampire attack. It's just that we can never find the bloodsucker who's done it." Leah ducked under a branch, Parker following after her.

"Anything about the time of death or the locations where the bodies are?"

"I'm not a coroner, so we don't know when anyone died. You'd have to check the reports... Which would be a problem because people think that you're dead, leading to questions and questions are really bad right now." Leah sighed and glanced to their left, then to the right. "The locations are weird, like the vampire that's been doing it has been spying on the packs. Whenever our pack is to the north, they attack in the south and vice versa."

Parker followed her lead, looking around and listening to what was going on. "So, what do we do, then?"

"What do you mean?"

"Couldn't you try to make sure that your pack's movements are as random as possible?" Parker frowned and took a deep breath in. The smell of the forest, of tree sap and pine needles was calming his nerves.

"We tried that. It didn't work. Maybe this one took the initiative to use cameras or some other technology. That would explain how they know where we are. Or there are two vampires, one with precognition, the other with the ability to hide their scent?" Leah shook her head. "But then we would've smelled the other one."

Parker frowned. "How do you guys keep running around the woods without the investigators spotting you, if there's humans investigating the murders?"

"We hear and smell them a lot sooner than they can see us. The forest shortens peoples' field of vision." Leah made a gesture with her hand. She lowered her voice and continued walking. "Speaking of which, be quiet. There's people ahead. Go back to the house. I don't want to have to reveal what's going on to people and I don't want you to rip them apart, okay?"

"I'm fine, Leah." Parker blinked and listened, following. The rustle of undergrowth and lowered voices muttering weren't exactly that hard to pick out. The forest was quiet for reasons other than that and it stood out. Both of them treaded carefully, keeping their footsteps light.

Leah looked back and gave him an exasperated sigh. "You try anything, though, and I will kill you if needed."

Parker nodded. "I know." He kept his voice as low as he could.

As they got closer to the area, the voices became louder.

"Hey, they get the dental marks for the bites here?" a gruff voice said, definitely male.

"You mean the forensics back in Seattle? No, they haven't. Whatever it is, though, they're IDing it as human. That's why they sent that BSAA guy here, but he disappeared," a lighter, masculine voice said.

"When do you suppose they'll find his body?"

"...No idea. Those things, from what I've heard, don't hide bodies, so they should've found him by now."

Leah gestured around and Parker followed her. Leah was quickly going from tree to tree, Parker following suit and they looked down to where the people were.

"Unless he got bumped off by those terrorists like Veltro," the gruff voice said. Parker got a glimpse of the man. The man had dirty blond hair, both him and his companion wearing some sort of police uniform, both of them wearing gloves. What was strange to Parker was how he could, if he felt so inclined, count the number of hairs on the man's head.

Parker shook his head. This sensory stuff was going to give him problems if he kept spacing out like this.

"Veltro's been dead for years. It'd have to be something more recent, like those people who were involved in Kijuju," the man's companion said. This one had darker hair, him a bit shorter than the blond man.

The wind shifted slightly and Parker noticed the scent of blood in the air mingling with the scents of the two men. He dug his hands into the tree he was behind, shaking as he did so.

"Huh... And what's the body count? Hard to keep track."

It was so tempting to go up to them, to bite them and drain their blood. He took a deep breath out of force of habit, which didn't help matters. Wood splintered in his fingers as he gripped the tree harder, making a cracking noise.

"Something around 21 deaths, not including this one."

Parker glanced to Leah, who was watching him carefully. He presumed she was preparing for having to pounce on him, if he tried to attack. He felt saliva build up in his mouth. He was _drooling_, for goodness sake, at the thought of killing people. He swallowed, his eyes wide, taking another breath in and out. The pain at the back of his throat burned uncomfortably.

"You hear that?" The blond man had said this. He was looking in their general direction. Leah jerked her head back to the men. Parker glanced back and forth between the men and Leah.

"Probably just some animals. If it were those BOW things, they would've tried popping up before now, from what I heard. How long is it going to take to find whatever or whoever's responsible for this?" The brunet man frowned.

"Only lead's the DNA tests."

Parker was getting accustomed to their smell now. He took a deep breath, lessening his grip on the tree trunk. Okay, he could do this... He glanced to Leah, who was looking a bit less worried now.

"And they think that it got contaminated because of all the weird shit that popped up in it," the brunet said. "So they're getting all the stuff analyzed again in a different lab."

The blond man ran his fingers through his hair. "So, what, we're supposed to take the body back to the county morgue? Or do the others need to take more photos of the scene?"

"Load it up. They already got a bunch of them." A few minutes of loading the corpse into the back of a police car later, the two men had gotten into the vehicle and drove off, down a barely used road. After another minute, Leah walked out from behind her tree, Parker following her.

"You scared me for a bit back there... How the hell aren't you trying to eat people?" Leah looked around the spot where the body lay. There was dried blood lying on top of the grass, along with some of it mixed with the dirt.

"I... I'm not sure."

"Seriously, this isn't normal. The other leeches are really confused about you, too, and I'm trying to figure it out. What keeps you from killing them?" Leah glanced around. Parker could still smell blood in the air, along with something vaguely familiar lingering in the air.

"Uh, well... I, uh, I'm disgusted by the idea of killing people and of wanting to do so. It's..." Parker frowned. How could he describe it? "I know I want to, because of the smell and whatever happened with my transformation, but..." He shuddered. "Anyway, can you tell anything about this?" He made a gesture around where the body had laid.

"Well, aside from all the humans, there's still the smell of a vampire, maybe. It's mostly gone now. The blood overpowers it, along with all the people who were here earlier to investigate the scene of the crime." Leah crossed her arms. "Meanwhile, Jacob isn't doing anything." The bitter tone again. "Seriously, he's got a better sense of smell than I do and he needs to be here. Hell, he found the body."

Parker blinked and cocked his head to the side. "What does he do all day?"

"You know how I was saying last night how he imprinted on Nessie."

Parker let out a growl. "Let me guess, grooming her to be his wife?" Parker glanced around, scowling. "Where is he?"

"Don't know. What the hell are you going to do?"

"Huh, maybe give him a few punches."

"Look, Parker, I know it's fucked up. No need to tell me twice, okay? But, if you try to beat him up, he will probably kill you. Like it or not, we all defend this area and, though the girl's being, as you put it, groomed to be his wife, her parents will probably tear your head off and light you on fire personally." Leah put a hand on his shoulder. "Just don't do anything rash. You'll just get yourself killed if you do."

Parker nodded, anger still bubbling under the surface. He walked away, heading back to the house. Leah followed him, him assuming that it was just in case there were more humans in the area, to subdue him as needed.

"Look, Parker, I know how fucked up it is." Parker continued through the forest, looking around, up in the trees. "What are you looking for?" Leah said.

"People don't look up when searching for someone, so maybe the vampire's hiding above your guys' eye level? And weren't you saying earlier about the idea of cameras?"

"Yeah, but if we're too busy with our heads in the clouds, we'll miss what's right in front of us," Leah said, slightly irritated.

"...Doesn't hurt to try something new."

"And the scent never goes up trees anyway. And that puts us back to square one, now that I think of it. What sort of rogue vampire would bother taking the time to set up cameras in an area to watch out for wolves, when there are a lot of other places to go to for a meal."

They made it back to the house. From what Parker could see and hear, only he and Leah were out and about on the grounds. They'd stopped for a moment, Parker still failing to understand why on earth the Cullens would need such a large house. "And why bother staying here for so long, even with the ability to hide or evade? There's still a chance that we could find them and rip their head off," Leah said. She crossed her arms.

Parker frowned at this. "Yeah, that doesn't make sense," he said. "Have you tried telling the others this?"

"Yeah. Get brushed off."

"Why?" Parker blinked.

"Well, they don't exactly think I'm..." Leah sighed. "I don't think they trust my intention with my trying to be somewhat polite to you."

"Why?"

"I'll say it again. I normally hate vampires, but you were in the same position as everyone in the pack was in the beginning. You didn't ask for it, unlike Bella, and you're a lot different from how the other vampires all look down on shapeshifters as dogs that are barely fit to do their jobs." Leah scrunched her nose. Her tone lightened slightly. "You still smell bad, though. I hope your boyfriend isn't a shapeshifter and likes it."

"...Bella asked to become a vampire?"

"Yeah. I don't get why. Wanting to kill people tends to be a bad thing in most humans' books. Hell, shapeshifters kill vampires because almost all vampires attack humans." Leah's expression darked again. "Probably fits her, though. She jerked Jacob around like a sadistic puppeteer until he imprinted on Nessie."

"I take it there's some bad blood between you and her?" Parker said.

"Yeah. Well, back a few years ago, when this was all new to us, I was protective of Jacob. Jacob was sort of like an adopted little brother to me in the pack. Seth, my little brother, was, too. Well, ever since the whole mess with how Bella treated him and all the stuff involving imprinting..." Leah shuddered. "Anyway, we never really got along, for obvious reasons. She wouldn't stop leading Jacob on and the pack all have a sort of mental connection when we're transformed. I could feel everything Jacob and the others felt, but Jacob wouldn't stand up for himself, so I tried to chew her out over it. Never worked."

Parker blinked. His eyes widened. "Wait, so, when you're transformed, you can feel how Jacob and that one guy Quil-?"

"When they're also transformed." Leah was starting to look pale and clammy. "Don't remind me of it. Do it again and you're getting a punch to the face."

"Okay, got it." Parker held up his hands in a slight bit of a surrender gesture. Leah blinked and stared at his arm. "What?"

"...Why do you have a tattoo?" Leah said, still staring at his shoulder. The way her eyes were so wide and her mouth being slightly open worried him slightly.

"It's traditional to get a tattoo like this if you're a sailor and you sailed across the Atlantic and back. Uh, I can sail..." Parker scratched the back of his head awkwardly with his other hand.

"Vampires lose all tattoos. Carlisle was saying how one of his bloodsucker friends lost his tattoos and that the guy was complaining about it. Why the hell is it still there?"

Parker shrugged. "Luck?" He glanced around and was starting to worry again. He seemed to be a lot different than the other vampires. What exactly was going on? Not that he minded how he kept his tattoos (he had more than the anchor), but it was strange.

Leah frowned. "Vampires and luck don't go together. Well, they do, but only to themselves. Not for others."

"Sorry."

"Don't worry about it, old man," Leah said. She put a hand on his shoulder. "Funny how this works out." She laughed once, without any sort of humor to it. "Would've thought my brother would be all enthusiastic about seeing you. He _likes_ vampires."

"Oh, really?" Parker didn't quite know what to think about this. "But you guys hunt vampires, don't you?"

"Yeah. Well, he grew up dealing with the Cullens. Okay, they're pricks a lot of the time, but they don't actually kill people. Doesn't stop them from condoning their vampire buddies' activity, though. Despite the rogue vampires, he likes them."

Parker didn't quite know how to respond to this.

A/N:

In Eclipse, the Cullens were extraordinarily passive, while the wolf pack was searching for vampires, despite how Victoria and the newborn army was a threat to their secrecy. What on earth would make them change in a few years into being active?

Also, brunet is masculine, while brunette is feminine, sort of like the difference between blond and blonde.

-The Sleep-Deprived Writer


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Thank you for the feedback, Arc. (Sorry that I didn't say this last chapter.)

The week after Parker had been up and about and just before everyone retired for the night, Carlisle called a meeting in the living room. Everyone that was a part of the family was gathered around, Alice sitting on the floor, Jasper lurking nearby. Carlisle was at the front of the room, Edward standing nearby with Bella in his arms. Renesmee was in Esme's lap, Esme sitting in one of the chairs, and Rosalie and Emmett were sitting on the couch. Parker sat on the floor, legs crossed, sitting near Renesmee and Esme.

"I've called you all here because of this." Carlisle held up a letter. Parker cocked his head to the side. It was some sort of fine paper, very thick and expensive looking stationary. Hell, in this day and age, he was surprised they didn't get an email instead. It went a lot faster and was less likely to be lost due to some error in the chain of being sent.

Alice appeared to be in a bit of a trance. "Oh... Well, that's certainly going to be interesting." she said under her breath. "And it's a bit foggy."

"The Volturi are coming within the next two weeks to investigate the matter of the rogue vampire that's been threatening our secrecy."

Parker gave Carlisle a confused look.

"Yes, Parker?"

"Who are the Volturi?"

"The Volturi are the guardians of vampire laws. They only get involved in serious events that threaten the secrecy of vampires. Were humans to find out we exist, they would kill all of us, regardless of our contributions to society."

Parker rolled his eyes. (_Of course they would_, he thought._ Even you guys, even if you don't kill people._)

"I heard that," Edward snapped.

"Behave, you two," Esme said.

Renesmee reached down to touch Parker's head. Parker was flooded with a mental image of them playing in an oddly familiar field of flowers joyfully, him barely registering the extreme change in temperature. The joy felt distant, like it was supposed to be his, but it was foggy. She broke contact with him and smiled, her eyes still having that unnaturally adult gleam to them.

"Uh, what the hell just happened?" Parker was still disoriented from whatever was going on.

"That's sweet," Edward said, his voice quiet. He still looked as though he had a stick permanently shoved up his rear end though, rather sour.

"Renesmee has the ability to show what she thinks or feels by touching you," Bella said. "It's the opposite of Edward and my abilities."

"And watch your language around her."

Parker looked over at Bella. "Uh, what's your ability?"

"I have a strong mental shield that I can extend to others."

"Oh. Okay?"

"As I was saying," Carlisle said. He set the letter down on the table in front of him. "I want you to all be on your best behavior. Especially you, Parker. The Volturi know we all are here, but they will be surprised at the new addition to our coven and they will not be too happy were you to attack them on sight."

Parker blinked. That was an odd way of putting it. (And Edward was still glaring at him.) "Do you think they'll catch the killer?"

"They did not get to their position in the world without being competent," Jasper said. "And they have a tracker."

"A tracker? Someone who specializes in this sort of thing?"

"Yes. Demetri is known for being the best of the best at it," Carlisle said.

Parker frowned. "But, wait, if they have a tracker and these murders have been going on for the past three weeks, why the hell didn't they send someone sooner to find the bastard responsible? A lot of lives could've been saved." He stood up and another growl came from deep within his chest and he bared his teeth. The other members of the household recoiled slightly, Esme wrapping her arms around Renesmee protectively.

Parker felt a wave of calm hit him. He glanced toward Jasper, who was frowning slightly again. "They live in Volterra, remember? They only get involved when something goes on for too long or is too conspicuous," Jasper said.

"And by 'too conspicuous,' you mean what?"

"When it's inhuman, but the bite marks look human." Edward said. He crossed his arms.

"But that includes BOWs that are based off of humans. I was sent here because the attacks looked like Ooze attacks without their slimy..." Parker tried to think of a word for it, his irritation getting the better of him. "Secretions. Are you telling me that the Volturi were involved with Raccoon City or with Terragrigia?"

"We do not know what they do on their official business," Carlisle said. "You'll have to ask them when they get here."

Parker scowled at the unnatural feeling of his irritation leaving him due to Jasper. "Okay, then."

"Any other questions?" Carlisle said.

"How many are they going to bring, Alice?" Rosalie said.

Alice cocked her head to the side, her eyes not seeming to focus on anything in particular. "Aro, Demetri, Caius, and Marcus, so four. Also, I'm not sure but I do see a clear night one of the nights. We end up outside, but it's fuzzy. Shapeshifters may be at the proceedings."

"Anything else?"

"Not that I can tell, just yet." Alice shrugged.

"Okay, so the meeting is adjourned." Each of the members of the family went their separate ways. Parker headed up the stairs to his room without taking any care to the other members of the family.

Parker laid down on his bed and frowned, thinking of what to do with his time. Running away was a no-go. From what he could tell, he was still a danger to the humans in the area and he didn't want to kill anyone. ...And he didn't want to raise questions about what was going on and, if he told them about vampires, he assumed he'd be dead by the next week at most, along with anybody he'd told.

He turned over, looking out the window. The moon was out, at its' first quarter, light streaming into the room. The thuds and gasps had started up again tonight (_that was quick_, he noted). He vaguely wondered how on earth Edward dealt with being in so many others' minds as they had sex.

Parker grinned. That train of thought had given him an idea, a way to annoy Edward even slightly, especially since Edward seemed to treat him as though he were a plague-carrying rat. He turned to lay on his back and closed his eyes. He unbuttoned his shirt slowly, imagining something that had happened recently, last time Raymond and he had managed to meet.

He ran his fingers down his chest and stomach lightly. They'd experimented a bit that time, Raymond tying Parker's arms up with a bit of rope to the bed's frame and teasing him very slowly...

The next day, when Parker woke up, he really had to stare for a moment at the bed. Along the sheets, there was a patch of cloth that glittered in the sunlight. He shaded it for a moment, the sparkling of the patch stopping. He burst out laughing. There was something inherently absurd about the idea of glittering vampire ejaculate.

He quickly washed up in the bathroom and got dressed, then headed down the stairs. When Parker entered the room, he noted that Edward started scowling. Parker grinned slightly, letting certain mental images enter his mind involving nudity, rope, and a jar of Nutella.

"Stop it!" Edward snapped. He got up, spun around, and glared at Parker, all in a fluid and graceful motion (that would've impressed most people, Parker figured, but it seemed like being a showoff on Edward's part).

"Stop what?"

"You're purposely doing that!"

"And? You keep acting like I'm a rabid dog," Parker said. He crossed his arms and looked at Edward. "Might as well enjoy a bit of my memories while I'm here and he's gone. And it is frustrating, constantly hearing everyone of... age," Parker glanced up and down Edward with a skeptical look. "Making a racket."

"Don't worry about Edward," Emmett said. Parker felt a hand on his shoulder. He glanced to Emmett. "He's always sort of had a stick up his ass when it comes to sex. He was over a hundred before he got laid." Emmett grinned and stuck his tongue out at Edward, who'd huffed.

Parker blinked. "Oh, really?" He grinned. "Why'd it take him so long?"

Edward rolled his eyes and stomped out of the room, walking past Bella. She turned to follow her husband.

"Well, he's said a lot of stuff about mind reading and how he thought most women were shallow. He couldn't read Bella's mind and they ended up together."

Parker blinked. "...I see. So, is he always that judgmental?"

"...Mostly when dealing with people he doesn't like or whenever people get on his nerves." Emmett walked around the couch and sat down on it. "One time, in the sixties, I managed to piss him off. I bet Rosalie that he wouldn't get laid by the end of the decade. He found out."

Parker walked around and sat down on the other side. "Ah, and what did he do, aside from throw a fit?"

"Mostly along the lines of destroying my stuff for the next five years. Totally worth it, though." Emmett grinned. "So, what do you think of all this... vampire stuff?"

"I... I just want to go home. Back to my friends and family, but I could kill them."

"Yeah, well, you'll get used to it." Emmett put his feet up on the coffee table. He frowned. "You can't visit them. Even if it weren't for the newborn bloodlust, when they notice that you only visit at night or on cloudy days and how you don't age, that raises questions. Vampires aren't allowed to reveal themselves to humans and the human gets killed or turned if they find out."

Parker blinked.

Emmett said, "Yeah, rule that the Volturi enforces."

A/N:

How to annoy Edward Cullen: Be in his mind-reading range and start thinking perverted thoughts. Bonus points if it's something he'd deem immoral, like something other the missionary position sex, penis-in-vagina sex, BDSM, etc.

Also, I realize that Raymond and Parker meeting up intermittently is reminiscent of River Song and The Doctor. *dons Whovian fez* :|

Also, the Nutella thing is a running joke a friend of mine and I have; when they were a Raymond RPer, they made jokes about Raymond being a total Nutella whore, while I write in both fics and RP Parker as being into food play in the bedroom, thus the implications.

-The Sleep-Deprived Writer


	10. Chapter 10

A few days later, Parker took the chance and sneaked out of the house one afternoon, not putting on his shoes. He was about a mile away from the house before he heard the sound of footsteps. Parker hid behind a tree and looked, whoever or whatever it was (it was downwind of him, so he wasn't sure). It was sunny out, so he'd sparkle if he walked toward it. The person (and it was a person) that came into view had bright red hair. Parker got out of hiding and walked toward him.

"Raymond?"

The man looked at him, a look of disbelief mingled with relief on his face. "Parker? What the hell is going on? Where were you?" He started walking toward Parker. "And... Uh, why are you glittering? ...And what happened to your eyes?"

Parker, now that Raymond was so close, was trying to ignore how Raymond smelled so sweet. "I got turned into a vampire." Raymond burst out laughing. "I'm serious, Raymond. And it's worrying me because you smell delicious."

Raymond continued to laugh, doubled over, tears streaming down his face. Parker frowned, but let Raymond continue. He tried to ignore the venom welling in his mouth (he was told something in passing about his saliva becoming venom that could transform people) at Raymond's scent.

When Raymond stopped laughing, he wiped the tears from his eyes and said, "That has got to be the worst excuse I've ever heard. Seriously, though, where the hell were you? The BSAA started calling me up, asking me where the fuck you were, thinking that maybe, because you and I are 'pals,'" Raymond snorted with a slight bit of derision. "-That I would know where you were. After I told them that you weren't with me, they told me you were dead." Raymond grabbed Parker's shirt by the collar, glaring at him. "Why the hell did you disappear like that? That's not like you at all!"

"Raymond..." Parker put his hand on Raymond's cheek, looking him in the eyes. "I'm serious. I was out investigating and got mauled by a bear. Some doctor and his granddaughter, who are both a part of this family of vampires, brought me back to their place and transformed me. I've been there ever since, trying not to go insane, because the vampires almost never do anything of importance, from what I can tell."

"You're freezing." Raymond glanced to Parker's hand for a moment, then back to Parker's eyes. He let go of the grip he had on Parker's shirt.

"Yeah, I know. And there's werewolves or something running around here. They've been trying to find out what's going on as well, because it's their job. The only one of them that hasn't wanted to rip me apart told me that it smells like a vampire of some sort, but they can't quite track the trail for some reason."

Raymond stared at him. "I... Uh, how?"

Parker swallowed the venom. "Do you think I know? I came out here to look for BOWs and ended up wanting to kill people and drink blood myself..." Parker gave him an extremely worried look. "Look, Raymond, I just need you to listen and to trust me." Parker took a deep breath, trying to calm down.

"You're not kidding...?"

Parker pulled Raymond into a hug. "No. All I know is I need to get as far away from there as possible and you need to come with."

"Why?"

"Because, well, I'm worried about how they'll take this whole affair. I get the impression that they don't particularly like humans, even if they don't kill people. And they're... rather homophobic and I think they only tolerate me due to being a vampire like them." Parker listened. There was something rustling, but the pattern of footsteps sounded like an animal of some sort.

"Are they the ones killing those people? And how would they know about-?" Raymond frowned. "Did you tell them that you and I-?"

"There's some weird thing about vampire eye color that indicates whether or not you eat people. And one of them can somehow read minds. Don't ask me how. Some sort of crap about special abilities... Well, somehow, he found out about some of my inclinations and, well..." Parker noticed that Raymond was much warmer than he was. He buried his head in Raymond's shoulder. Probably another bad idea, in retrospect, given his wanting to drain Raymond's blood, but he wanted this sort of contact.

"Parker, let up!" Raymond squirmed in Parker's grasp, butting his head against Parker's.

Parker let go of Raymond. "Sorry about that."

Raymond rubbed along his forehead with one hand and chest with the other. "Dammit, you're much stronger than you used to be."

"Sorry, I, uh... I missed you." Parker still heard that rustling in the underbrush again. He frowned and looked around. A gray blur bolted out and stopped, a large light gray werewolf. "Leah."

The wolf quickly transformed back into a young woman. Raymond blinked. "Uh, so, wait, she's a werewolf?"

"Shapeshifter. The true werewolves only transform at night during a full moon," Leah said. She held out her hand, giving a quick worried glance to Parker. "Leah Clearwater."

Raymond took her hand, still slightly in a daze. "Raymond Vester."

"So, why are you here?"  
"I came looking for him. Partially has to do with work, though. I'm supposed to investigate the deaths and disappearances, including his," Raymond said, nodding toward Parker. "Though, I suppose it has to do with the vampires in the area? Wait, have you been eating people, Parker?" Raymond's eyes widened.

"No, just deer," Parker said, giving him a worried look.

Leah said, "Okay, okay... Uh, look, I'm gonna lead you back out of the forest and you need to get far away from here. Unfortunately, Parker's going to have to stay." Both of them gave her glares. "Well, look... Jacob's the Alpha in the pack. He's forcing me to keep him here, Vester, and I can't fight it."

"Why do I have to stay here?" and "Why does he have to stay?" were both said at the same time.

"Don't know. Something about the little half-vampire saying that Parker needs to stay here. Probably so she can have him be her weird uncle or something." Leah rolled her eyes. "And Nessie gets whatever she asks for."

"Weird? I'm the only sane vampire there!" Parker said. He growled again, then shook himself. It was strange, making those sorts of animalistic noises whenever he was angry.

Leah sighed. "When dealing with the Cullens, normal is bad, if you haven't noticed. Are you stupid?"

"We ended up in a confrontation with someone who tried to kill me, yet he still trusted her and ended up getting shot because of it," Raymond said. A bit of his normal, somewhat snarky demeanor was returning, from what Parker could tell. Parker stood there for a moment, without a response.

"Okay, good to know that he's dumber than a brick sometimes. Anyway, I run pretty fast, so you're gonna have to carry him, Parker. Unless we're going the slow way, but that leaves us a bit open to the Cullens or either of the wolf packs finding us more easily."

"Let's just walk," Parker said. "Spending a bit of time together would be nice," he continued, glancing at Raymond.

"What do you think, Raymond?"

"...How much can you fight that control? At all? Could you maybe try to misinterpret your orders?" Raymond said. He frowned.

"No. I can't. The Alpha's word is law for shapeshifters and the only time it can ever be fought if one is considered of a higher-ranked lineage, which I'm not."

There was a rustle in the underbrush and something landed on top of Parker, pushing him down. Parker smacked it across the face with a resounding crack, it letting go of him. A few birds, startled by the noise, flew up into the air, squawking. He blinked. It was a sand colored werewolf, a bit slighter than the others.

"Seth, what are you doing?" Leah said.

His tail wagged back and forth, the wolf quickly turning back to human form. "Uh, hi, Leah."

"My younger brother, Seth, you two." Leah put her hand to her forehead. "Look, I know. Through the mental connection, I heard. Please don't try to suck up and act like you're tolerant when you join in the stupid bullshit the others do."

"Leah, what are you talking about?" Seth laughed, it having a light, nervous tone from what Parker could hear. Parker and Raymond exchanged glances and looked back and forth between Leah and Seth.

"You know damn well what I mean."

"It's kinda weird that he's just able to control himself, okay?" Seth said, eying Parker warily.

"...In what way?" Leah said.

Seth frowned. "Sis, don't you remember what happened with the newborn army several years ago?"

"Yes, I remember," Leah said. "Bella was able to control herself just fine and they didn't confine her after they found out. Don't see how this is any different. Hell, he's weaker than the average vampire, anyway, so, if he did try anything, he's easier to contain and kill." She was scowling now, shaking in place.

"Well, and, uh, he's..."

"What?"

Raymond glanced to Parker. He grabbed Parker's hand and headed down the path he'd come, Parker following him. As they walked away, Parker could still hear Leah and Seth talking (more like arguing). "Parker..."

"All of them look like they're in their late teens and very early twenties. It's creepy." Parker felt as though he was going to be sick. He shuddered.

"Parker, you're really starting to worry me."

"...How come?"

"I mean, you're... You're acting strange, okay? What happened at that place?"

"Cabin fever?" Parker noticed the sound of something ripping apart and a few snarls and snaps back. He glanced around, listening around them for anything that could pop up. "All I want to do is get as far away from here as possible..." Parker stopped. "I run faster now, just point me in the right direction and we'll go."

Raymond glanced back at him. "So, what you're going to carry me now? That's..." He chuckled and looked at Parker. "Well, uh..." He scratched the back of his head and looked at Parker.

There was yet another rustle in the underbrush. Parker braced himself and looked around. It seemed as if the only time that happened was when it wasn't just an animal. Well, whatever it was, it had a heartbeat. It was hard to tell with Raymond near him, though, how fast it was beating. A large russet wolf jumped down on top of Parker. He squirmed under its' grasp, ignoring the pain that it landing on him had caused and how the squirming did almost nothing. "Tu genero di cagna!"

A shot rang out, then another. The wolf's blood dripped down on Parker, it letting up on him and turning to where Raymond was. It growled. Parker scrambled up. The wolf was slowly walking toward Raymond. "Raymond, put the gun away."

There was a high pitched giggle. The hairs on the back of Parker's neck stood up and he glanced around. That little girl, Renesmee (_how was it pronounced, again?_ he wondered), was there, her dress light blue and flowing. She, unlike himself or the other vampires, seemed to have a sort of glow or halo in the sun. If it weren't for the eerily adult look in her eyes, he would have compared her to a tiny angel.

Raymond looked back and forth between the little girl and the wolf, Parker coming to attention to what's going on. The wolf turned back into his human form, crossing his arms. The bullet wounds that Raymond had given him were healing up very quickly.

"Why did you do that?" Jacob said, his voice quiet.

Parker walked over to Raymond's side again. As much as he hated Jacob, he figured that angering a werewolf prone to exploding in fur and claws was a bad idea, especially around a human, regardless of the toughness of said human. "Look, he's new to all of this. He's a friend of mine and-"

"Jacob," Renesmee piped up. Her voice was sweet, overly so, and it sent chills up Parker's spine. She walked over and touched Jacob's hand. Jacob nodded.

"Come on, you two. Back to the house."

"What?" both Parker and Raymond said simultaneously.

"You're coming to stay with the Cullens," Jacob said.

Parker blinked. He and Raymond exchanged a glance.

A/N:

"Tu genero di cagna": You son of a bitch.

-The Sleep-Deprived Writer


End file.
